2:30!

I finished my first half marathon in 2:30 today! The official times aren't in yet, but that's what Roger told me. ;)

What a journey! I walked into the Shawnessy Running Room last September thinking that I would like to set a new goal for myself and maybe make some new friends. I did both!

Race day had me thinking about all sorts of things (and people). It's been a long road (literally - Neil, the answer is 527km if you did the whole training program according to plan. I was closer to 300km). At about 5km, I thought about Liz and legs. 5km was about 1 leg. That meant that I had another 3 to go! OMG! I was already tired and my right ankle was stiff from the cold. I stood around for an hour and a half waiting for my pace group to finish. They were all in the first wave and I wasn't due to start running until noon. I was very glad to see them, but my feet were thoroughly frozen by the time I started running. It took about 5km for my toes to totally unfreeze and get feeling back in them. By then, the weather had improved, the fog had lifted somewhat and I was stripping layers off. Oh, and I lost my balaclava somewhere along the route as I rearranged layers. I hope someone who needs it picked it up and gets some good use out of it.

About 1km before the turnaround point (10.55 km), I started my usual negative self talk. How was I going to possibly finish this? I felt SO tired and I wasn't even halfway done yet. I had just guzzled a bunch of water and ate some citrus-y Carb Booms, so I had heartburn on top of that. Very down. After the turnaround, I was following this older lady who had a really nice cadence. I was able to follow her for a while until I really got into the swing of things. I looked at my watch just when I started feeling really good and it said 12.80km. It took almost an hour and a half of running to feel "good". Weird. Before this, I never would have pushed myself past the point of feeling "not good" to be able to realize that there's often a "good" beyond that.

I was actually singing "Sherry" along with Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons as I crossed back under Crowchild Trail. I think I lost it a little there. From that point on, it was all willpower. I just didn't care about anything else in the world but putting one foot in front of the other. Right, left, repeat. As many times as it took to get to the finish line. That's when the REALLY weird thoughts started.

I was whining to myself as I went along; my hip hurts, my neck hurts, I'm tired, I'm bored, this iPod is retarded, blah, blah, blah. It dawned on me that Terry Fox did more than twice this distance EVERY DAY minus one leg and while he was dying. The whining stopped.

At around 15km, I felt like I could run forever. If I didn't ever stop, that is. Now that I'm sitting here, 7 hours after the race, I can hardly get going after sitting at all. At that point, though, I was completely convinced that I could run forever. No walk breaks, no pain, just me and my shoes. Wow. I was really loopy. And fast. I was averaging 5:30 - 6:00 per km. I NEVER run that fast. I felt GREAT! Totally invincible.

Then the next amazing thought dawned on me. My goal, in answer to anyone who asked, was to finish the race upright and smiling. It's my first half marathon, no sense being overly ambitious. I didn't really know what to expect of myself yet. All the usual lines, know what I mean?

At 19km, I realized that I had a real shot at finishing this race in less than 2:30:00. In that secret place in my heart, I had wanted to finish in less than 2:30:00, but didn't honestly think I could do it. There's no point in telling people, "my goal is 2:30", then coming in closer to 3:00 or not even finishing. Let's face it - my running career started pretty pitifully. I trained for 4 months for a 10km race, then signed up for the 5km because I didn't think I could really do 10km when race day arrived. I wanted to give myself an out. I've never really believed in myself when it comes to running.

I got pretty excited when I realized that I could probably do it in under (or really close to) 2:30:00. I pushed. Billy Joel sang in my ear about how it's My Life and I ran faster than I ever thought I could. I rounded the last corner and took a quick peek at my watch. 2:30:02. Holy cow! As far as I'm concerned, I did it! My son met me on the path with about 50m to go and ran in holding my hand. As they put the medal around my neck, I stopped my watch at 2:30:53.95.

Tonight, I sleep. Deeply and well, I hope. I'm very satisfied with myself and can't wait for the next adventure!